More Costco Nuggets...

It's been so long since I've posted about Costco wisdom bits that I almost don't know where to start... I guess with what sticks out the most (no pun intended... maybe):

• Skinny men with little pot bellies should not wear soccer shirts.
• I LOVE kids that look like little adults. You know what I'm talking about--those kids that, when you look at them, you can imagine EXACTLY what they'll look like in 10 or 20 years, and probably what field of work they'll be in. Tiny little accountants, restaurant managers, and CEOs just waiting to be old enough to be taken seriously. LOVE THEM!
• Some people just like to make noise. As adults, we are usually trained out of this, but if you look around at Costco, you will see a lot of kids chanting, "[: Puppy, puppy, puppy, puppy :]" (note the musical repeat brackets indicating endlessness), singing tunelessly, or just walking around seeing how long they can sustain an, "Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh."
• You are never too old to ride in the cart... especially if you're pushing around one of their flat beds
• You can conquer irregularity with little fiber gummi bears that taste like candy. Who knew?
• Dark chocolate covered acai and blueberries=TOTALLY AWESOME!
• Signing books in the clothes section=not awesome
• Morningstar Black Bean Burgers rock my world!!!

I'm sure there's more. Maybe it will come to me later, but for now I have a massive bag of Pirate's Booty to consume so I have room in my pantry for everything I bought.

Bon Apetit!

What I Learned from Murray Costco

The best part of doing signings at Costco may just be all the vicarious shopping an author gets to do. You can tell a lot about a person by looking in their shopping cart!

One cart contained about 6 boxes of granola bars, grape juice, Ex-lax and Prilosec. Another, candy, candy, candy, candy, cups, and olives.

I passed (punny) on asking about the first cart but I did inquire about the second: it was for a wedding with a candy bar... still trying to figure out the olives... :)

Every cart is different and Costco, and the contents vary from entire playgrounds to bedsheets and bacon. I don't know where they hide it all, but Costco may very well have everything!

As for what I learned, here we go:

• Belts look best on people who technically don't need them
• It is "in" to turn full-length pants into capris with one fold mid-shin (this fad will pass quickly, methinks--especially when paired with gladiator sandals)
• Everyone is going camping but me
• Don't pass me 4 times, or you will succumb to my charm
• My old drama teacher is doing great
• My friend's son just got back from his honeymoon and needs a refridgerator
• I am very good at selling other author's books--maybe too good...
• When pronounced correctly, American children have no interest in eating Daims.
• Kindles/Nooks kind of rock... even if I still technically prefer books
• Strangely enough, no one wants to buy a magazine when the magazine rack is positioned behind a signing author
• If only I had stayed 4 hours longer, I might have run into someone I knew :)

As a side note, Welcome to Stalk Lake City goes to press tomorrow, all new and improved and stuff. I think I'll be up until 2 proifing it, but the good news I finally know what the dedication will be. Nothing felt right until I got it right. And now, I feel peace :)